When I Feel Like My Body is Attacking Me

Today I have a Doctor’s appointment. Today is the day I will hopefully start to find some answers. I probably will not find all the answers today, but I am happy to be headed in the right direction.

Almost two years ago, shortly after my son was born, I started to notice some physical differences. I gained a lot of weight (more than in my pregnancy), my hair started to fall out and I noticed I was always tired and fatigued. I was pretty worried, but wouldn’t take enough time off of work to go to the doctor.

At that time, we lived in western Washington. I consider Washington to be very progressive as far as natural health and green living are concerned. Some of my friends were dealing with their own health issues at the same time and their doctors recommended they stop eating gluten. Gluten is a protein found in wheat. It made a big difference with some of their symptoms, so I decided I would try it for a few days and see how I felt.

Three days after cutting out gluten, I felt a difference. My steps were lighter!! I specifically remember walking from my work car to the job site and realizing that I felt better. After work I was able to cook and clean with ease. It was a revelation to realize I wasn’t lazy, I was just really tired. A few days later, I stopped losing hair. One month later, I started eating gluten again, to see if there was a change, and I started losing hair in about five days.

Since then, I have lived mostly gluten free. As time progressed, though, I found my symptoms to get much worse if I was accidently exposed to gluten. It started with three days of fatigue. One day, I went to Subway for lunch to get a salad. I explained my gluten situation and watched the young lady at the counter change her gloves. As she dipped her gluten free gloves in the veggies, I realized, everytime they make a sandwich, they touch those veggies with gloves that have gluten on them. That evening, after work, I had to take a nap before dinner.

After moving to Nevada, I asked my doctor to test me for celiac disease. Celiac disease is a disease in which chronic failure to digest food is triggered by hypersensitivity of the small intestine to gluten. My doctor told me to put gluten back in my diet for several days and then take a blood test. My test came back negative; I did not have celiac disease. At that point, I wondered if all of my gluten symptoms were my imagination. Was I making it up? Was it an excuse to be lazy?

As time progressed, my “gluten symptoms” got worse. If I even opened a bag of wheat flour, I would be incredibly sick the next day with “the trots,” severe fatigue and sometimes horrible joint pain.  After one gluten exposure, I wanted to cry every time my son touched me.

Eventually, as I started to learn where gluten usually hides (thanks to a good friend whose husband is celiac) I got contaminated less often.

After not getting contaminated for a month or so I thought the worst of it was over. It was under control. Then I started to get sick when I hadn’t been exposed to gluten. The symptoms were different, but I could tell something I was eating was making me sick. After a few weeks, I narrowed it down to eggs and maybe coffee.

At this point, I went to an allergy specialist and had a skin test done. After the test, the allergy doctor told me I had no allergies. He made me feel like everything I was experiencing was not real and only in my head. He told me there was nothing wrong with me. I felt so bad, I cried in his office. I really just wanted to know what was going on with my body!!

After the discussion with the allergy doctor, I decided I didn't want to spend any more money on copays to these doctors who weren't going to help me. It was getting expensive and emotionally exhausting.

My new plan was to juice fast and do an elimination diet coming off of it. The juice fast was great!! I lost about 35 pounds in about a month. I felt wonderful and started feeling better about my appearance. I was 4 pounds away from a normal BMI!!!

I broke my juice fast on a date night baseball game. My husband and I were long overdue for a date night and naturally, a baseball game is better with beer!! One of my true food loves is dark, hoppy beer!! Giving up good beer was the saddest part about being gluten free. Strangely enough, the beer and the other glutinous treats I had that night had no effect on me. I was shocked!! Did my juice fast heal me?  Was I going to be a normal, beer drinking member of society again? Would I be able to share mac n cheese with my two year old son?

After a couple of weeks of eating whatever I wanted, I noticed that I still felt better when I cut out gluten. So I removed gluten from my diet once again. It wasn’t too bad, at least I can eat eggs and coffee!!

All of this takes me to where I am now. I ended my juice fast near the end of April and have gained all 35 pounds back. If you have never juice fasted, this may seem normal, but I have had other juice fast success and putting on 35 pounds in three months is not normal for me, no matter how poorly I eat. Fast weight gain, ok, I can deal with that. I need to exercise and diet. No problem. But that doesn’t explain everything else. Now my hair is falling out by the handfuls, worse than ever, even without gluten in my diet!! My girly cycles have been irregular and I have started getting so fatigued I would get nauseas. All of this came to a point I couldn’t function a few days before leaving for Washington. So to make it through the trip, before I could see a doctor, I increased my thyroid medication (I know, bad move, but I had to do something and all of these symptoms fit with hypothyroid). It helped, I had a great time, I was only a little fatigued but I didn’t to do much but spend time with friends and loved ones.  I do not recommend anyone changing their medication without the consent of a doctor; I was in a desperate place.

I have many theories about what has been happening to me in the last couple of years and I am excited to talk to my doctor, with new information and a new blood test, to find out what is going on with me. I hope my doctor gets excited to help me find out, if not, I may have to find a new doctor. This time, I am not taking no for an answer!! We will get to the bottom of this!!

Thank You for allowing me to go through this and put it down in writing. My goal in writing this is to help me organize my thoughts so I can talk to my doctor about everything that has been going on. I think she needs to see the whole picture to help me effectively.

I also want to give encouragement or incite to anyone going through similar issues, especially as I start to get answers. And to let anyone else who feels their body is attacking them know they are not alone. God did not design our bodies to function like this!! It has to get better!!  So follow me as I try and find out what exactly is causing my poor health and how I try and correct it. I can’t promise that I will get these answers right away, or every effort I make to reverse this damage will help in any way, but hopefully this information will help someone else who feels like their body and their doctors have let them down.

May Your Joy Be Full,

Rachel

 

12 Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you.

1 Peter 4:12 (ESV)

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